Proud to be from Texas. | SouthernPaddler.com

Proud to be from Texas.

oldyaker

Well-Known Member
Aug 26, 2003
1,949
31
A man walks into the produce section of his local super market and asks to buy a half head of lettuce. The young fella work'n the produce section told him he could only purchase a whole head of lettuce. The man was insistent that the young fella ask the manager about this matter.
Walking into the back room, the boy say's to the manager, "Some a$$h*le wants to buy a half head of lettuce." As he finished the sentence, he turned to find the man standing right behind him! So quickly added, "and this nice gentleman has agreed to buy the other half." The manager approved the deal, and the man went on his way.
Later, the manager said to the boy, "I was impressed the way you got yourself out of that situation earlier. We like people who are quick on their feet! Where are ya from son?" "Texas sir", the boy replied. "Well why did you leave Texas?" the manager asked? The boy said, "Sir, there ain't nuth'n but whores and football players down there!" "Really," said the manager. "My wife is from Texas ."
"No sh^t", replied the boy. "What team did she play for?"
 

oldsparkey

Well-Known Member
Aug 25, 2003
10,479
123
Central , Florida
www.southernpaddler.com
Oldyaker ......... That is ......ALMOST A ....#ONE.....(it is bad to pick on Texans but you did save ys self)

Let me splain it ......
This southern farmer got married and he and his bride were going down the road in there horse drawn carriage .... When the horse starts acting like a Yankee, ya know cutting the fool.. :? ..
The farmer says ... that one and the horse behaved.

Later going down the same road the horse again starts acting like a Yankee and the farmer is getting disturbed about it so he say's ....thaws TWO.... The horse behaves.

A short distance on down the road the horse again act's like a Yankee and the farmer say's ...that's THREE.... Hops off the wagon and grabs a big pot of stale gritz and forces them down the horse's gullet.

His new wife is just appalled by that action and proceeds to tell her new husband what she thinks about his actions in no uncertain terms ..... The farmer looks at her and says.....That ONE

She shut up and was just as nice as could be for the rest of the marriage. She was from up nawth and hated gritz. :p

YOUR'S IS ALMOST A #ONE...............But a good one :lol: :lol:
Chuck.