Chuck is selling his dog | SouthernPaddler.com

Chuck is selling his dog

A

a Bald Cypress

Well-Known Member
May 7, 2007
577
0
80
Northwest Louisiana
A guy is driving around the back woods of SW Florida and he sees a sign in front of a broken down house boat: "Talking Dog For Sale"

He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is on the aftdeck.

The guy goes to the aftdeck and sees a nice looking
Labrador retriever sitting there.

'You talk?' he asks.

'Yep,' the Lab replies.

After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's your story?'

The Lab looks up and says, 'Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young.

I wanted to help the government, so I told the
CIA. In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders. Because no one figured a dog would be easesdropping. '

'I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running.

But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the Coast Guard to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in.
I uncovered some incredible dealings, and was awarded a batch of medals.'

'I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just
retired.'

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he
wants for the dog.

'Ten dollars,' the guy says.

'Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling
him so cheap?'

'Because he's a liar. He never did any of that shit."
_________________
 
K

Kayak Jack

Well-Known Member
Aug 26, 2003
13,976
171
86
Okemos / East Lansing Michigan
A buddy of mine has a basenji, the African lion dog. Extremely intelligent and even more extremely independent. It's like raising two or three juvenile delinquents in the same house. Anyway, Bill and I have a dialogue for when we introduce Eli (the dog) to others.

Me: Ya know, Bill has a very smart dog.
Other person: Oh yeah! How smart?
Bill ( a bit hesitantly here): Oh, he's not so smart, Jack.
Me (with dead certainty): He sure is! After all - he plays checkers with you, Bill.
Bill (somewhat proudly): Yeah, but I can beat him three out of five games. And, I think he cheats on those two, but I can't catch him at it.
 
T

tx river rat

Well-Known Member
Feb 23, 2007
3,043
2
Waco Tx
Chucks last dog was just as bad
Chuck had been training this dog for years , had him where he could read write add subtract.
One day Chuck took the dog in a bar and ordered a beer ,the bartender told him to get the dog out of there they didnt serve mutts.
Chuck nicely explained the dogs accomplishment,the dog spoke to the bartender politley asking for a beer. Well now that bartender was impressed brought Chuck and the dog a drink ,and started asking questions. Of course Chuck had to brag a bit and told him how the dog could read ,discus current event. He asked the bartender if he had a paper so the dog could read it for him.
Well there was no paper to be found so Chuck gave thhe dog a 20 dollar build and told him to go buy one.
After an hour Chuck was getting upset no dog ,he really didnt want to lose him with all that training invested . Chuck and the bartender went down the street calling the dog after a couple blocks they went by an alley and there he was, he had found a female in heat was was really enjoying himself.
Now Chuck was furious walked up jerked the dog of the female and went to chewing him out ,asked the dog, whats the matter with you ,you never did this before . The dog looked up and grinned ,said but boss I ain't never had had 20 bucks before,
CHUCK SHOT THE DOG
 
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