Two little old ladies were sitting on a park bench outside the local
town hall where a flower show was in progress.
The thin one leaned over and s aid, 'Life is so darned boring. We
never have any fun any more. For $10.00 I'd take my clothes off and
streak through that stupid flower show!'
' You're on!' said the other old lady, holding up a $10.00 bill.
The first little old lady slowly fumbled her way out of her clothes and, completely naked, streaked (as fast as an old lady can) through the front door of the flower show.
Waiting outside, her friend soon heard a huge commotion inside the hall, followed by loud applause and shrill whistling.
The smiling and naked old lady came through the exit door surrounded by a cheering crowd.
'What happened?' asked her waiting friend 'I won 1st prize for Best Dried Arrangement.' she said!!!!! :shock:
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I will never hear church bells ringing again without smiling.
Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her
95-year-oldgrandmother and comfort herWhen she asked how her
grandfather had died, her grandmother replied 'He had a heart attack while we weremaking love on Sunday morning.' Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble Oh no, my dear,' replied granny. 'Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even.Nothing too strenuous, simply, keeping rythm on the Ding and on the Dong.' She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued,
'He'd still be alive if the ice cream truck hadn't come along. :roll:
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how to install a home security in the south
1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size
14-16 work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns
and Ammo Magazine.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:
Hey Bubba, Me, Big Jim, Duke and Slim went for more ammunition.
Back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls - they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.
Better wait outside.
"Cooter" :lol: :lol: :lol:
town hall where a flower show was in progress.
The thin one leaned over and s aid, 'Life is so darned boring. We
never have any fun any more. For $10.00 I'd take my clothes off and
streak through that stupid flower show!'
' You're on!' said the other old lady, holding up a $10.00 bill.
The first little old lady slowly fumbled her way out of her clothes and, completely naked, streaked (as fast as an old lady can) through the front door of the flower show.
Waiting outside, her friend soon heard a huge commotion inside the hall, followed by loud applause and shrill whistling.
The smiling and naked old lady came through the exit door surrounded by a cheering crowd.
'What happened?' asked her waiting friend 'I won 1st prize for Best Dried Arrangement.' she said!!!!! :shock:
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I will never hear church bells ringing again without smiling.
Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her
95-year-oldgrandmother and comfort herWhen she asked how her
grandfather had died, her grandmother replied 'He had a heart attack while we weremaking love on Sunday morning.' Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble Oh no, my dear,' replied granny. 'Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even.Nothing too strenuous, simply, keeping rythm on the Ding and on the Dong.' She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued,
'He'd still be alive if the ice cream truck hadn't come along. :roll:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
how to install a home security in the south
1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size
14-16 work boots.
2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns
and Ammo Magazine.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:
Hey Bubba, Me, Big Jim, Duke and Slim went for more ammunition.
Back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls - they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.
Better wait outside.
"Cooter" :lol: :lol: :lol: