Now that's fast!

[jdupre']

An old country boy was visiting the airport and marveling over the huge planes taking off and landing from all over the world. As he is looking out of the window, a woman at a nearby counter asks "Can I help you sir?". Where is the plane going to New York?" he says. She points out the big jumbo jet right on the tarmac " That one right there is scheduled to take off in a couple of minutes at 12:15." He asks " When is it gonna arrive there?". Not knowing that airlines usually state arrival time at the destination, he seemed surprised when the lady said "12:16- would you like to buy a ticket ?" "No mam, but I just want to stand here and watch that sucker take off!"

Joey

 

[bearridge]

A good joke always begins "........one time there wuz this ole country boy...." :mrgreen:

 

[oldyaker]

Another old country boy.....

A man owned a small farm in South Texas, near Pleasanton.

The Texas State Wage & Hour Department claimed he was not paying
proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to interview him.

"I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them," demanded the
agent.

" Well," replied the farmer, "there's my farm hand who's been
with me for 3 years. I pay him $200 a week plus free room and board.

The cook has been here for 18 months, and I pay her $150 per week plus free room and board. Then there's the half-wit who works about 18
hours every day and does about 90% of all the work around here.

He makes about $10 per week, payshis own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night He also sleeps with my wife
occasionally."

"That's the guy I want to talk to --- the half-wit,"
said the agent.

"That would be me, replied the farmer.

 

[jdupre']

Good one , Yaker. Puts me in mind of something along similar lines. A well-known business guru was advertising a seminar for small business owners. He promised to show how you could run your own business by only working half a day. Needless to say, lots of people showed up on the night of the seminar.

As people eagerly waited, the guru took the stage. After a round of enthusiastic applause , the speaker started to speak. "It is very easy to run your own business by just working half a day. The problem is picking which 12 hours of that day you want to work."