Turtle Burgers ...... | SouthernPaddler.com

Turtle Burgers ......

oldsparkey

Well-Known Member
Aug 25, 2003
10,479
123
Central , Florida
www.southernpaddler.com
Uncle John sent me a e-mail; of this since he was doing some of them for the 4th of July get together.
I located the recipie and pictures for on here from the Burger Doctor web site.

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****** http://burgerdoctor.com/bacon-cheese-tu ... rgers.html ******

Who doesn’t like a nice cheese burger with bacon? And adding a lot bacon and sausages doesn’t hurt either. When you use your imagination with all these ingredients something magical can happen.

If you are looking for a festive burger for a nice holiday celebration there is nothing like this Bacon Cheese Turtle burger. It is tasty, filling and cute!

The burgers I made are very large but you have to make them this big for everything to fit nicely together.

Makes 4 large turtle burgers

Ingredients:

4 lbs of ground beef (80% lean)
10 hot dogs sausages of you choice
4 slices of American Cheese
2 lbs of bacon (I prefer center cut)

Instructions:

1... Form 4 patties and make them oval like a turtle body. Using a finger make 4 holes at the bottom in each corner of the patty for the legs. Make one hole in the center front from the top for the head.

2... Cut sausages in half and insert each half in the holes of the burgers. It will require quite a lot of handling the meat and reforming it, but give yourself a little time and they will eventually look good.

3... Place a slice of cheese on the top of each turtle.

4... Now form a small blanket of bacon like in the pictures to a size that will cover the back of the turtle. Once formed place the bacon blanket on the back of the turtle. You may also just make the blanket directly on the back of the turtle.

5... Heat an oven to 400F and place turtles in the oven for 30-40 minutes until bacon is nice browned and crispy. You may want to use a meat thermometer to check the doneness of the meat (130F for medium).

6... Voila, a beautiful turtle burger that will make heads turn. Serve them in a bun with you favorite toppings or eat as a steak. It is all up to you.

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This is from the burger Doctor web site.... http://burgerdoctor.com/bacon-cheese-tu ... rgers.html

This one shows how to weave and fasten the bacon to the hamburger and basically how to assemble the turtle.....
http://followmyrecipe.blogspot.com/2010 ... r-fun.html

Chuck..............
 

oldsparkey

Well-Known Member
Aug 25, 2003
10,479
123
Central , Florida
www.southernpaddler.com
Piper .....

Make this cake for Jack at the next get-together to go with his Turtle Burger.... A Kitty Litter Cake.

kitty-litter.jpg


CAT LITTER CAKE RECIPE - A sure fire hit for the next family get together or party. WANT TO HAVE FUN AT A PARTY? PREPARE THIS RECIPE AND WATCH YOUR FRIENDS' FACES !!

[*NOTE: THIS CAKE CONTAINS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING THAT IS NOT EDIBLE!!*]

CAKE INGREDIENTS

1 box spice or German chocolate cake mix

1 box of white cake mix
1 package white sandwich cookies
1 large package vanilla instant pudding mix
A few drops green food coloring
12 small Tootsie Rolls or equivalent

SERVING "DISHES AND UTENSILS"

1 NEW cat-litter box
1 NEW cat-litter box liner
1 NEW pooper scooper

Prepare and bake cake mixes, according to directions, in any size pan. Prepare pudding and chill. Crumble cookies in small batches in blender or food processor. Add a few drops of green food coloring to 1 cup of cookie crumbs. Mix with a fork or shake in a jar. Set aside.

When cakes are at room temperature, crumble them into a large bowl. Toss with half of the remaining cookie crumbs and enough pudding to make the mixture moist but not soggy. Place liner in litter box and pour in mixture.

Unwrap 3 Tootsie Rolls and heat in a microwave until soft and pliable. Shape the blunt ends into slightly curved points. Repeat with three more rolls. Bury the rolls decoratively in the cake mixture. Sprinkle remaining white cookie crumbs over the mixture, then scatter green crumbs lightly over top.

Heat 5 more Tootsie Rolls until almost melted. Scrape them on top of the cake and sprinkle with crumbs from the litter box. Heat the remaining Tootsie Roll until pliable and hang it over the edge of the box.

Place box on a sheet of newspaper and serve with scooper. Enjoy!

Recipe and directions from...... http://www.kristianhoffman.com/kitty-litter.htm ..... Web site.
 

graybeard

Well-Known Member
Dec 24, 2009
255
0
61
Between keyboard and chair
Or Susan Mudgett's infamous cat poop cookies:

"There are two flavors: chocolate (dark brown), and gingerbread (light brown).

I seldom measure carefully so amounts may need adjustment, especially on flavoring. The cookies are dense and not very sweet. This is necessary so that they will keep their shape during baking. If you use white flour or sugar they may be tastier but they won't look like sh|+."
Chocolate ingredients:

½ cup honey
2/3 cup (1 and 1/3 stick) butter, margarine or lard
1 egg
1 tsp vanilla or peppermint extract
2 cups whole wheat flour
1/3 cup cocoa powder
Grape-Nuts™ cereal
Gingerbread ingredients:

¼ cup honey
¼ cup molasses
2/3 cup (1 and 1/3 stick) butter, margarine or lard
1 egg
2 and 1/3 cups whole wheat flour
spices: ginger, cinnamon and cloves to taste (maybe ½ tsp each)
Grape-Nuts™ cereal
Mix-ins:

coconut (tapeworms)
chocolate chips
butterscotch chips
peanut butter chips
cooked spaghetti or ramen noodles (roundworms)
corn
peanuts
M&M's™
To make:

Microwave the honey till it bubbles (about 1 minute).

Add the butter, (I've been told using lard makes for a more realistic texture and softer cookie) and the molasses, if any.

Add the egg.

Mix well; then mix in all the other stuff. Add mix-ins of your choice to some or all of the batter.

Chill 1 hour in the freezer or several hours in the fridge.

Roll dough logs of random length and the diameter of cat poops. Roll logs in grape-nuts and bake at 350 degrees till done (maybe 10 to 15 minutes but with my flaky oven you never know). Note: someone with a reliable oven says it's closer to 20 minutes for him.

Serve in a disposable cat litter box on a bed of Grape-Nuts™ cereal, with a new, unused cat litter scoop. I hear you get lovely effects by decorating the box and scoop with melted chocolate or pudding. I imagine brown sugar might work as a substitute for the new clumping litters, but I haven't tried it. I've been told that mixing brown sugar with the Grape-Nuts™ "sweetens up the cookie a bit while still looking truly hideous."
 

oldsparkey

Well-Known Member
Aug 25, 2003
10,479
123
Central , Florida
www.southernpaddler.com
Kayak Jack said:
Has anybody mentioned that you guys are certifiably sick? That stuff doesn't bother me - I've eaten Chuck's cooking in camp.

:lol: :lol: :lol:

I have eaten some of Jack creations , he fixed up , while out camping and as amassing as it sounds , we both survived the ordeal , "O"oop's .... respective meals. :mrgreen:
 

oldsparkey

Well-Known Member
Aug 25, 2003
10,479
123
Central , Florida
www.southernpaddler.com
Kayak Jack said:
Hell - it was pretty amassing that I survived at all. :wink:

Yep... Camping meals makes survivalists out of all of us especially when we have to eat that Yankee chow as good as it was. Would of been better with some grits on the side and some fat back , cooked , and mixed in with it.

For the folks that have no idea what Fat Back is .... Some people call it Salt Pork or Side Meat. Sort of like bacon but a whole lot better........A whole lot better when done up right. :D

A few hints on how to use it.........

http://www.cooks.com/rec/search/0,1-0,salt_pork,FF.html

Me , I like to get a slab of it , slice it ... then boil it to remove a lot of the salt ( I boil it twice with fresh water each time ) and then fry it like bacon ( which it is ) then make a sandwich out of it to enjoy while outdoors. Ya have to slice it thick a 1/4 inch to make it really good for a sandwich. :D

If you don't boil it for a while to remove some of the salt it is just to salty , anyway to salty for my taste , that is why the 2 times boiling it with a water change between boilings.
"O" make sure you remove the rind (skin ) before eating it ... that does get quite hard....or just trim it before cooking it :wink:
 

graybeard

Well-Known Member
Dec 24, 2009
255
0
61
Between keyboard and chair
Woo dog. I haven't had salt pork in 30+ years. I haven't even seen it up here. Now that you've reminded me, I'll have to find some.

Menu:
Salt Pork, boiled and fried
Southern Cornbread (made with less sugar and a little bit of bacon grease)
Great Northern Beans (soaked overnight, slow boiled with a ham bone)
Pan fried pork chops (the one dish my mother could always make, bless her heart)
Poached spinach, with hard boiled egg and a dribble of the hot vinegar out of a jar of pickled peppers

For dessert: pecan pie, banana cream pie or red velvet cake?