Wet Feet
- Thread starter ohioriver
- Start date
About three years ago a local university historian was involved in making a documenatry film about the Iberville and Bienville expedition coming thru Bayou Manchac in the early 1700's.
They wanted some authenticity so they called friend Keith and asked to borrow a dugout. No problem, as friend Keith is always willing to participate in intellectual endeavors.
Anyway on the designated day, the dugout is brought to the designated waterway and this "authentic" French fur trapper shows up to paddle "his" dugout. He's covered in rat hides, beads and all sorts of period stuff.
Friend Keith is steadying the dugout and when the trapper gets in, it's obvious that he's never done this before. Now this dugout has a seat in it which makes it more comfortable to paddle but also makes it way more tipsy on top of it being already tipsy. Friend Keith tries to tell the trapper to sit on the floor but he won't listen.
When they're ready for the camera to start rolling, another guy shows up with a real 300 year old musket and hands it to the trapper in the dugout and says "don't get this wet".
By now y'all know the rest of the story....when fiend Keith lets go the dugout the trapper flips over and the antique musket is in several feet of water. The trapper smells like a wet dog and the owner of the musket wishes he'd stayed home that day.
The day wasn't a complete lost, they ended up dressing friend Keith up in a costume and he got to be in the movies.
They wanted some authenticity so they called friend Keith and asked to borrow a dugout. No problem, as friend Keith is always willing to participate in intellectual endeavors.
Anyway on the designated day, the dugout is brought to the designated waterway and this "authentic" French fur trapper shows up to paddle "his" dugout. He's covered in rat hides, beads and all sorts of period stuff.
Friend Keith is steadying the dugout and when the trapper gets in, it's obvious that he's never done this before. Now this dugout has a seat in it which makes it more comfortable to paddle but also makes it way more tipsy on top of it being already tipsy. Friend Keith tries to tell the trapper to sit on the floor but he won't listen.
When they're ready for the camera to start rolling, another guy shows up with a real 300 year old musket and hands it to the trapper in the dugout and says "don't get this wet".
By now y'all know the rest of the story....when fiend Keith lets go the dugout the trapper flips over and the antique musket is in several feet of water. The trapper smells like a wet dog and the owner of the musket wishes he'd stayed home that day.
The day wasn't a complete lost, they ended up dressing friend Keith up in a costume and he got to be in the movies.
Friend ohio,
Over the years I reckon I seen my share of folks fallin' outta their boats. Bout half the time it wuz climbin' in 'er crawlin' out. Ya learn real fast not ta run the nose of the boat up on the bank (like a iohn boat) ta git in 'er out. After that ya learn ta move slow 'n careful.....sidewise, but geezers gotta give up gymnastics. Movin' slow aint a choice no more. I reckon that iz where all them Flyin' Wallendas went.
I mite be on my last kneelin' expedishuns. More'n a few times they have hurt so bad I had ta roll the boat over 'n fall out.....jest ta git up. The first time I had ta do that wuz over 10 years ago, so I mite have rode that horse on the last roundup.
I keep tellin' the paddlin' geezers we gotta git a nurse that kin massage ole men, keep track of their dope 'n stick a tumble horse landin' like a gold medal gal. One 'er two of 'em got a mean woman at home (like in all the ole blues songs....put salt in their coffee 'n such) who mite cut 'em if we git a fine nurse with a top drawer floor routine. :mrgreen:
regards 'n move slow
bearridge
paddlin' geezer canoe clud
We are grateful to the Washington Post, The New York Times, Time Magazine and other great publications whose directors have attended our meetings and respected their promises of discretion for almost forty years. It would have been impossible for us to develop our plan for the world if we had been subjected to the lights of publicity during those years. But, the world is now more sophisticated and prepared to march towards a world government. The supranational sovereignty of an intellectual elite and world bankers is surely preferable to the national auto-determination practiced in past centuries. David Rockefeller
Over the years I reckon I seen my share of folks fallin' outta their boats. Bout half the time it wuz climbin' in 'er crawlin' out. Ya learn real fast not ta run the nose of the boat up on the bank (like a iohn boat) ta git in 'er out. After that ya learn ta move slow 'n careful.....sidewise, but geezers gotta give up gymnastics. Movin' slow aint a choice no more. I reckon that iz where all them Flyin' Wallendas went.
I mite be on my last kneelin' expedishuns. More'n a few times they have hurt so bad I had ta roll the boat over 'n fall out.....jest ta git up. The first time I had ta do that wuz over 10 years ago, so I mite have rode that horse on the last roundup.
I keep tellin' the paddlin' geezers we gotta git a nurse that kin massage ole men, keep track of their dope 'n stick a tumble horse landin' like a gold medal gal. One 'er two of 'em got a mean woman at home (like in all the ole blues songs....put salt in their coffee 'n such) who mite cut 'em if we git a fine nurse with a top drawer floor routine. :mrgreen:
regards 'n move slow
bearridge
paddlin' geezer canoe clud
We are grateful to the Washington Post, The New York Times, Time Magazine and other great publications whose directors have attended our meetings and respected their promises of discretion for almost forty years. It would have been impossible for us to develop our plan for the world if we had been subjected to the lights of publicity during those years. But, the world is now more sophisticated and prepared to march towards a world government. The supranational sovereignty of an intellectual elite and world bankers is surely preferable to the national auto-determination practiced in past centuries. David Rockefeller
Well, I've never fallen in. I have, from time to time, been forced to demonstrate such maneuvers so new paddlers could learn. But, never accidentally.
Hey Ohioriver,
Chanches are that somewhere someone has a picture. Wheather they will own up to it is another story. They are probally making a monthly paycheck from Jack with it. :wink:
Bob
Chanches are that somewhere someone has a picture. Wheather they will own up to it is another story. They are probally making a monthly paycheck from Jack with it. :wink:
Bob
Had a spill out of my old red plastic canoe. The canoe had a double floor that had strengthening ribs molded into it and had a layer of styrofoam under it for flotation and molded in "knee pads". While standing to move something around, my foot caught on the knee pad and over I went.
I had my firemaking kit and in short order had a fire going to dry out. It takes a LONG time to dry out soaking wet clothes.
When I got home, I ripped out that double floor, which lowered the center of gravity when standing. With all that extra plastic and the watersoaked foam gone, the canoe lost about 10 lbs.
Joey
I had my firemaking kit and in short order had a fire going to dry out. It takes a LONG time to dry out soaking wet clothes.
When I got home, I ripped out that double floor, which lowered the center of gravity when standing. With all that extra plastic and the watersoaked foam gone, the canoe lost about 10 lbs.
Joey
I'm surprised that Chucky hasn't posted the picture already. Yakus Flashbulbicus took it in Canada a couple years ago.
Joey, don't wear cotton clothes when paddling. Nylon, fleece, wool, polypropylene, etc.
Joey, don't wear cotton clothes when paddling. Nylon, fleece, wool, polypropylene, etc.
I guess it was about five years ago,A buddy and I decided to do some paddle fishin' from my canoe. We knew a place where the reds would be held up in a super low winter tide.
It was colder than a well digger's...well it was dang cold for this part of South Florida. I was wearing waders but my buddy being a tough guy from Colorado :roll: refused to believe it was cold. I guess subconciously I was on a mission to learn him a lesson.
Now you should know that we are no lightwieghts and straining a canoe was our business of the day and business was good.
I am a solid 250# and Brian was 350# if he was a pound. Brian was in the back and I was in the front with my legs hanging out on each side. We managed for a good long while in this configuration. We eased into a shallow area where I thought it would be a good idea to do some wading. This is where the problem developed.
When i slid off the front of the canoe without letting Brian know my intentions....well,it got silly.
As soon as my butt cleared the nosecap of the canoe it shot into the air what seemed like ten feet. :shock:
This is when fishing turned to lesson in perspective. On my end of the canoe,I was turning blue from lack of oxygen due to extreme laughter,Brian on the other end had different reasons for the shades he was showing.
It's just too bad the fire in his eyes couldn't warm his blue lips.
It didn't help that I said,"hey,I thought you said it wasn't cold!" :lol:
It was colder than a well digger's...well it was dang cold for this part of South Florida. I was wearing waders but my buddy being a tough guy from Colorado :roll: refused to believe it was cold. I guess subconciously I was on a mission to learn him a lesson.
Now you should know that we are no lightwieghts and straining a canoe was our business of the day and business was good.
I am a solid 250# and Brian was 350# if he was a pound. Brian was in the back and I was in the front with my legs hanging out on each side. We managed for a good long while in this configuration. We eased into a shallow area where I thought it would be a good idea to do some wading. This is where the problem developed.When i slid off the front of the canoe without letting Brian know my intentions....well,it got silly.
As soon as my butt cleared the nosecap of the canoe it shot into the air what seemed like ten feet. :shock:
This is when fishing turned to lesson in perspective. On my end of the canoe,I was turning blue from lack of oxygen due to extreme laughter,Brian on the other end had different reasons for the shades he was showing.
It's just too bad the fire in his eyes couldn't warm his blue lips.
It didn't help that I said,"hey,I thought you said it wasn't cold!" :lol:
Kayak Jack said:
Cotton's good enough MOST of the time down here. This was early fall, kinda brisk 65 F. :shock:
jdupre' said:
I guess Florida is like Louisiana , if everyone wearing cotton or a blend of it was to not wear anything they would be known as the nudest states. :lol:
I don't know if this counts since he was not in the canoe but hanging onto it.
A buddy and I were doing some turkey hunting on one of the rivers here in Florida and when we arrived at the area we wanted to hunt , he stepped out of the canoe and onto the bank. The bank was a little slippery :roll: and the next thing I knew is one hand was on the canoe , rifle barrel was sticking up out of the water and his hat was floating.
It was one of those rare mornings when there was some frost on the ground so we got a fire going and let him dry out. Needless to say we missed the early morning time to get in the woods so we just called it quites for the day.
I'm happy to say that the next morning things went better and we each got a turkey and no one went swimming.
Chuck.
I posted this a couple months ago.
Yesterday , I meet I meet a couple friends , Strider and Seashell at the River did a little paddling
and played in the wind and surf on the Brazos (dang that wind was high)
We got ready to come in I nosed my boat up onto the concrete boat ramp. (1st mistake) with narrow nose this lets the boat rock then started to get out and as I stepped on the bank I realized my leg feels a little strange (guess was sitting wrong leg was asleep) like its made of rubber.
Yea you know whats coming
trying to keep from slipping in the red clay next think boat starts sliding back into the water.
I am thinking not good
well as I stretched could feel my hamstring really pulling as I started doing the split I just turned loosed feel on my backside into about 6 inches of watter and a foot of mud.
I will have to hand it to Strider and Seashell they didn't crack a smile
Good folks there, dont know how they did it.
Glad they did not have a camera I might be famous like Jack
Ron
Yesterday , I meet I meet a couple friends , Strider and Seashell at the River did a little paddling
and played in the wind and surf on the Brazos (dang that wind was high)
We got ready to come in I nosed my boat up onto the concrete boat ramp. (1st mistake) with narrow nose this lets the boat rock then started to get out and as I stepped on the bank I realized my leg feels a little strange (guess was sitting wrong leg was asleep) like its made of rubber.
Yea you know whats coming
trying to keep from slipping in the red clay next think boat starts sliding back into the water.
I am thinking not good
well as I stretched could feel my hamstring really pulling as I started doing the split I just turned loosed feel on my backside into about 6 inches of watter and a foot of mud.
I will have to hand it to Strider and Seashell they didn't crack a smile
Good folks there, dont know how they did it.
Glad they did not have a camera I might be famous like Jack
Ron
Ron....
Jack has more class then that he just locates a log and rolls out on it with the boat seat attached to him. He does not do splits or any of the fancy stuff like normal folks do.
No Sir ... He just rolls out with dignity and grace that no one has matched to this date. It has to be a Kayak Jack thing and we are just not ready for such classy maneuvers. Or we have not had the pratice. :lol: :lol: :lol:
OK... Jack you were saying ... Why hasn't Chuckles posted the picture that made oldyaker famous as a photographer........
I do have to say that down at Outhouse Key Jack got out of his kayak like it had an ejector seat in it , Might of been the fact that half of his kayak was beached and the three foot waves coming in gave him a boost.
Me I took my time and made it after a wave came over the stern and slapped me in the back , convinced me to get out and to dry ground.
Oldyaker , when he pulled in we just took his kayak and inverted it , made it easy for him to get out. :wink:
Chuck.
PS. Jack always keeps his seat with him.
Jack has more class then that he just locates a log and rolls out on it with the boat seat attached to him. He does not do splits or any of the fancy stuff like normal folks do.
No Sir ... He just rolls out with dignity and grace that no one has matched to this date. It has to be a Kayak Jack thing and we are just not ready for such classy maneuvers. Or we have not had the pratice. :lol: :lol: :lol:
OK... Jack you were saying ... Why hasn't Chuckles posted the picture that made oldyaker famous as a photographer........
I do have to say that down at Outhouse Key Jack got out of his kayak like it had an ejector seat in it , Might of been the fact that half of his kayak was beached and the three foot waves coming in gave him a boost.
Me I took my time and made it after a wave came over the stern and slapped me in the back , convinced me to get out and to dry ground.
Oldyaker , when he pulled in we just took his kayak and inverted it , made it easy for him to get out. :wink:
Chuck.
PS. Jack always keeps his seat with him.
oldsparkey said:
Chuck.
PS. Jack always keeps his seat with him.
I give him an "9.5" for form and a "10" for style. A solid gold medal performance.
The wife was passing by and saw the picture. She stopped and looked at it and said. "I didn't know kayaks had ejection seats".
Bob
Bob
Danged Multi-tool on my belt hung up in the seat. Couldn't shake it loose. And, of course, Old Yakus JimmieOlsonicus was standing by.
Come to think of it, that was the only thing he did right the whole trip. He hung up his water strainer for us all to use, then put Dago Red in it. There we were in Ontario, and he was looking for manatee to swim with. He did, in his defense, have some darned good Red Hot Slim Jim's that mollified the Dago Red.
Come to think of it, that was the only thing he did right the whole trip. He hung up his water strainer for us all to use, then put Dago Red in it. There we were in Ontario, and he was looking for manatee to swim with. He did, in his defense, have some darned good Red Hot Slim Jim's that mollified the Dago Red.