What women want | SouthernPaddler.com

What women want

Lurker

Well-Known Member
Dec 6, 2003
83
0
Sun City, Arizona
Story goes thus.


Young King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a

neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was

moved by Arthur's youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his

freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question.

Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, if after a year,

he still had no answer, he would be put to death.

The question? What do women really want?

Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, and

to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. But, since it was better

than death, he accepted the monarch's proposition to have an answer

by year's end.

He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone: the princess,

the priests, the wise men and even the court jester. He spoke with

everyone, but no one could give him a satisfactory answer.

Many people advised him to consult the old witch, for only she would

have the answer. But the price would be high; as the witch was famous

throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but to talk to

the witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he would have to

agree to her price first. The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, the

most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur's closest

friend!

Young Arthur was horrified. She was hunchbacked and hideous, had

only one tooth, smelled like sewerage, made obscene noises, etc. He

had never encountered such a repugnant creature in all his life. He

refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such a terrible

burden, but Lancelot, learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur.

He said nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur's life and

the preservation of the Round Table.

Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered Arthur's

question thus:

What a woman really wants, she answered....is to be in charge of her

own life.

Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch had uttered a

great truth and that Arthur's life would be spared. And so it was, the

neighboring monarch granted Arthur his freedom and Lancelot and the

witch had a wonderful wedding.

The honeymoon hour approached and Lancelot, steeling himself for a

horrific experience, entered the bedroom. But, what a sight awaited him.

The most beautiful woman he had ever seen lay before him. The

astounded Lancelot asked what had happened.

The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she

appeared as a witch, she would henceforth, be her horrible deformed

self only half the time and the beautiful maiden the other half.

Which would he prefer? Beautiful during the day, or during the night?

Lancelot pondered the predicament.

During the day, a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at

night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch?

Or, would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day, but by night,

a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous, intimate moments?

What would YOU do?

What Lancelot chose is below.

BUT....make YOUR choice before you scroll down below. OKAY?



















































Noble Lancelot, knowing the answer the witch gave Arthur to his

question, said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself.

Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the

time because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of

her own life.

Now....what is the moral to this story?

The moral is..... If you don't let a woman have her own way....things

are going to get ugly. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Lurker
 
A

Anonymous

Guest
Friend Lurker,

Good ta hear frum ya. I wuz bout ta git worried.

regards,

bearridge
 
A

Anonymous

Guest
Fight?



Friend Justin,

See, real life aint exactly like in the movie pichurs. I figger aliens cruise round earth jest like high school fellas on Friday nite....ya know....hopin' fer a poke. I reckon that wuz what the aliens wuz after til they got spooked, left Ole E.T. (didnt git hiz last name) 'n took off fer home.

I spect its horny aliens on the prowl near bout everday. What if they kin make themselves look like Brittany, cept not so pudgy? They mite be able ta make themselves look like whatever they want....even a watermelon 'er a toaster oven. Lord what if one turnt itself inta the Sparkanator. That would plum ruin it fer me.

Sheesh.....I jest had anuther scairy mind pichur. What if one made itself look jest like Swampy....in a tu tu....cheerin' fer the Squids?

That would be a heap worse than Deliverance. I'm squealin' already.

Souuuuuuuueeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

regards,

bearridge
bodine aeronatikle 'n space administrashun



P.S. Dont ya recall when Ole Luke Skywalter went in that bar....before he turnt Jedi? Even the Governator wuz fooled in that one when they put some memories of that blonde in hiz head. I figger thats why the guviment dont want us ta know bout 'em. Remember how, after the aliens set 'em free, they always tell how they wuz "probed" a lot. Ya know what that means. :wink: I hope its horny women aliens that git me. I sho hope they aint like Certs....two mints in one. :mrgreen:





It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. Aristotle
 

Lurker

Well-Known Member
Dec 6, 2003
83
0
Sun City, Arizona
Bearridge,

Aliens didn’t get me, I have been busy helping to take care of my father-in-law, an 85-year-old Iwo Jima vet who is very sick and maybe in his last days. We have been living on 30 minutes sleep at a stretch.

Ain’t no burden bro, it’s an honor. He landed day two and stayed for the flag raising. In just over thirty days the Marine Corps won the battle for that island.

They paid a dear price, approximately 25% of the Marine Corps causalities for the entire war were sustained in the battle for Iwo Jima in just over thirty days. His unit had a causality rate of 87%.

So I won’t have much time for chatting with you guys for a while.

Semper Fi

Lurker
 

Oldtimer

Well-Known Member
Jan 21, 2004
143
0
Mis'sipy Delta--Temporarily
Lurker,

Right on, partner. He deserves the best you can give him now seein as how he probably gave his best and mayber better than he thought he could. Best wishes to all......I hope taps comes to him peacefully if that's the way of it.

Oldtimer
 

Swampy

Well-Known Member
Aug 25, 2003
1,736
0
Southeastern North Carolina
Bro Bar, that hat ain't doin ya much good if'in those picturez iz coming through! :shock:

Haz ya ever been able to think back to a time when Don R. wasn't a part o' the dinner? I'm think'in they haz got a special thang in th' wine...

The clue o' course waz that statement about " fore hitz time...."

I jest seen that Storm Trooper II .... seems they haz a way to git into ya. Sure did enjoy that little gal alien though ... :shock:

Now I'm waitin on sum Red Green CDs to come in... one due today... if I'm not on fer a spell hitz cause I'm into th' TV ... If anyone haz anythang on outer space hitz them fer sure.

Lurker, sorry to hear about your dad. Old Marines never die, they just change duty stations. Seems God is always looking for a few good men also. Sempher Fi

swampy
 

oldyaker

Well-Known Member
Aug 26, 2003
1,949
31
bearridge said:
I hope its horny women aliens that git me. I sho hope they aint like Certs....two mints in one.

I hear tell it's the alien wimen that has the equipment Bear, be careful what you wish for Br'r Bear! :shock:


Lurker, God Bless you and your Father-in Law, Went thru the same thing with my own Dad, he was in the European Theater WWII.
It's is very sad we are losing so many of "The Greatest Generation" everyday. We are losing living history. I would have liked to take my Dad to see the new WWII Memorial in DC before he went on to his great reward but it was not to be, too bad they took so damn long to build it. Anyway, prayers and thoughts go out to you and your hero.
 

oldsparkey

Well-Known Member
Aug 25, 2003
10,479
123
Central , Florida
www.southernpaddler.com
Lurker

I will bet for those thirty days on Iwo Jima he did not even get the 30 minutes of sleep. Take care of that Marine he took care of us, no, not you and I ...... the United States, our freedom and way of life.

I did the same for both of my parents and it is best to do what you can now then to later, look back and say .....If I would have only done this or that.....when it is to late and you can't.

Chuck.
 

Swampy

Well-Known Member
Aug 25, 2003
1,736
0
Southeastern North Carolina
My dad's, "JD", and my Purple Hearts are on a section of the American flag that I framed out of purple heart wood. Both medals hang there. Included is a picture of dad and some of his friends in the squad. Only three came off of Okinawa alive.... When I was stationed there in '66 it was a solumn occation to visit where the 22nd Marines fought.

I came home and told him so...

Do what you can with anyone who you love in this life... to much I have seen haunts those who choose differantly.

swampy