WO%K

[a Bald Cypress]

My 1 day employment


So after landing my new job as a Wal-Mart greeter,
a good find for many retirees,
I lasted less than a day......
About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud,
unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids,
Yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance..
As I had been instructed, I said pleasantly, 'Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart.
Nice children you have there. Are they twins?'
The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say,
'Hell no, they ain't twins. The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7.
Why the hell would you think they're twins? Are you blind, or just stupid?'
So I replied,
'I'm neither blind nor stupid, Ma'am,
I just couldn't believe someone slept with you twice.
Have a good day and thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart.'
My supervisor said I probably wasn't cut out for this line of work.

 

[seedtick]

That's probably the same reason why my wife told me not to bother

 

[oldsparkey]

Wal-Mart Greeters:

Two elderly Wal-Mart greeters were sitting on a bench during break.

One turns to the other asking, "Bald Cypress , I'm 73 years old and I'm just full of aches and pains. I Know you are about my age. How do you feel?"

Bald Cypress says, "I feel just like a new born babe."

Rather amazed, his co-worker repeats his statement in the form of a question, "Really? A new born babe???"

"Yup", grins Bald Cypress , "No teeth, No hair and I think I just wet my pants."

Chuck
Dam... I'm in trouble now. :lol:

 

[a Bald Cypress]

And I thought we had an agreement.

I would not let anyone know it was you who only had a job for one day and you would not tell anyone that was where I worked.

If you think Jack rips on you now and then, you ain't seen nothin yet.

It's on now.

 

[oldsparkey]

And I thought we had an agreement.

I would not let anyone know it was you who only had a job for one day and you would not tell anyone that was where I worked.

If you think Jack rips on you now and then, you ain't seen nothin yet.

It's on now.

Go for it , do your best and just remember I know Keith and seedtick and they make boats out of Cypress , especially the old sunken ones or should I say the really old ...WET... ones. Dang thinking about it ... that might of been why I posed that joke. :lol: :lol: :lol:
Do I hear incoming rounds , Yep ..... Sure do but I don't think water balloons will hurt me , that much.

Chuck.
Sorry about that but sometimes the truth just slips out , By the way the unemployment from them is really a nice thing to have for a while , no matter how short it is and it was nice having that small amount of time enjoying your company. :wink:

 

[seedtick]

my favorite Wal Mart story is about a woman walking into the store with a little kid about 8 or 10 years old.

the kid has on a hooded sweat shirt and she's holding him close by the hood and says, "before we git in the store i'm jest gonna tell you two words - be have"

 

[Kayak Jack]

When the "Lady with the Light" said, "Give me your poor, your weak, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free", she didn't know that all that tempest tossed refuse would wind up at Walmart and K Mart.